Sunday, January 25, 2015

All witches are eventually burned at the stake

I feel like it's that time again where I reiterate what the purpose of this blog is, since perhaps it's been too long and I have more new readers than I was aware of.  This is my personal journal.  This is where I vent all of my emotions.  I'm unfair, mean, emotional--all of the things I am not allowed to be in real life.  This blog has been my personal outlet for ten years now and I'm quite certain I wouldn't survive without a sounding board that goes off into oblivion that nobody gives a flying fuck about but me.  I'm grateful for the void.  I never look for a response.  I have a rule about never going back to read my blog and I never discuss it with anyone.  I guess I assume that everyone who happens to know my true identity knows that.  For that, I am wrong. Some of the things I have written have hurt real people in my real life and for that I am sorry.  It has always been the purpose of this blog to do the exact opposite: to protect people in my real life from the crazy that is in my brain by organizing my thoughts here, crying about my burdens, and maybe having one of my readers around the world identify with my struggle and be uplifted knowing they are not alone.  Where I was using it to protect people I love, it has now served as a vehicle to hurt them.  For that, I am speechless.  May my silence on that subject prove my remorse for the unintentional hurt that I have caused.  For anyone to read my writing and think I am anything but 100% committed to my family is quite simply beyond me, but I suppose I am only responsible for the words I write and have no control over how they are interpreted or used after they are published into the world.  Perhaps I simply have some growing up to do to accept that.